Poll

Does adultery justify divorce?

When we find out that we have been cheated the first thought we have is "I will get the divorce". We even know that Bible is blaming the adultery- "You shall not commit adultery", but some accept such a situation. Are you one of those who wants the divorce or accepts the adultery?

Poll Options

  Yes Vote
85.71% voted this
  No Vote
14.29% voted this
Total Votes: 28

Comments

explorerx7
Most people may not accept adultery, however, they are many who may not right away want to go the divorce route. They may try to stay together and try to forgive the party that has done wrong and moves ahead from there. There are others, however, will not be forgiving and would insisting on a a divorce. Sometimes this divorce situation turns out be be a very sordid affair. Frankly, I couldn't presently say what I would do if I were to be wronged in an adulterous affair, it would depend on my mindset at that particular time.
Posted by explorerx7 on 07-23-2017
morgoodie
I think it depends on the people involved and the circumstances surrounding the incident. Cheating breaks down the trust people have with their partner and without trust the relationship is doomed to fail. It is hard to earn back the trust someone has in you if you have done something to break it. Whether it ends in divorce, is up to the people involved and how much they want the relationship to work out for them. There are many things that people can do to try to work it out before they decide if that is the right route to take.
Posted by morgoodie on 07-23-2017
Anonymous
Mostly in nowadays marriage,adultery contribute a lot to the divorce crisis arise,partner or people reacts to situation in their own way character because cheating on others breaks trust and love of in a relationship it only God makes a relationship to stand on rock and not breaks but the most certain thing to be telling a marriage people always is to trust and love one another that even if crisis start ur love for that person cover that problem.
Posted by Anonymous on 07-23-2017
Neiltarquin
I will accept neither of the two. I came from a broken family so I don't want my kids to experience the same thing that I did. Marriage is sacred and this ecent was binded infront of our Divine Providence. With that, Our God shall be the only one who can separate the two.

Adultery is already been written as 1 of the 10 Commandments. For sure, it is already given that it is a sin.
Posted by Neiltarquin on 07-23-2017
wallet
I agree with you Neil, marriage is sacred and we must respect, love and cherish our partner and not commit adultery. This should come from our heart and not be forced on the circumstances or the Bible teachings. Thank you for your reply!
Posted by wallet on 07-24-2017
Frank
I always pity the children in the case of divorce, and I always think couples should always find a middle ground to settle all disputes irrespective of what it is. We should always know that kids will be affected and as such restitution can be sort.
Posted by Frank on 12-10-2018
Frank
I always pity the children in the case of divorce, and I always think couples should always find a middle ground to settle all disputes irrespective of what it is. We should always know that kids will be affected and as such restitution can be sort.
Posted by Frank on 12-10-2018
kgord
It depends on how long it goes on and whether the adulterous partner wants to stay in the marriage. Not all marriages could and should be saved, but it is up to the two individuals as to whether they want to work things out or not. It doesn't have to necessarily lead to divorce.
Posted by kgord on 07-23-2017
Alexa
There is no excuse these days. End the marriage first and then move on. People want to keep their options open and it's not fair on others. I think it's the deceit more than a partner loving someone else and the feeling of rejection. People can and do drift apart so it's best to be honest rather than stay together for the sake of it. I do feel people have grounds for divorce if they have been cheated on, but some wish to work it out, usually for status and financial reasons.
Posted by Alexa on 07-23-2017
WildSpirit
Of course it justifies!

I recognize that I am very radical with this kind of subject, but I can't stand any kind of betrayal, and no matter how long the relationship lasts (or if there are children involved... after all, they will grow anyway), and if there was adultery, it is separation without thinking twice.
Posted by WildSpirit on 07-23-2017
simplym
It all depends on the situation and couple. Also when you mean "cheating" that can mean differently to people. Like what kind of "cheating"?
Posted by simplym on 07-23-2017
lilac123
Personally, if it happened to me I would get a divorce. If it happened to anyone else, I would also totally understand if they wanted to get a divorce, but some people want to work through infidelity and that's fine as well as it's not really any of my business. I think that adultery destroys any trust that exists in a relationship and without trust, you cannot have a happy or healthy relationship. No matter what happens, there would be a constant fear in the back of my mind that it might happen again and I don't know if I would ever be able to trust that person again so I would rather leave as soon as it happens than dig a deeper hole.
Posted by lilac123 on 07-23-2017
wallet
You are right some accept adultery and they want to work through infidelity because they have few kids and for their children, they will sacrifice their lives and beliefs. I would understand such a point of view but I don't think I am a person that would accept something like this! Thank you Lilac for your answer!
Posted by wallet on 07-24-2017
SimplyD
Why would couples divorce at once when the other party commits adultery? Why not give the erring partner a chance to explain. If it is not because he fell out of love, but because of the enticement of the third party and he asks for a second chance then, why not give a second chance? I speak from experience. I forgave my husband because I can still feel his love for me. I never regretted forgiving him. :)
Posted by SimplyD on 07-23-2017
Pixie
If someone who I have complete trust on cheats on me and breaks my trust I am not sure if I will be able to forgive that person. As adults we can all distinguish what is right and what is wrong. I don't think I will be able to forgive my partner if he was found guilty of adultery and I will even file a divorce. There is no guarantee that he will not do such a thing again and why should I suffer and feel so much pain when it is not my fault.
Posted by Pixie on 07-24-2017
Denis_P
I understand that people's perspectives on adultery are going to vary, and some might think it is a forgivable act, while others would give the offender capital punishment. But my opinion is that adultery absolutely justifies divorce. I'm part of the group of people that feels adultery is not forgivable under most circumstances, and it would be unfair to make a partner stay with somebody if they feel hurt and betrayed by them. To someone that is deeply hurt by infidelity, I dare to say that it goes into the realm of emotional and psychological abuse.
Posted by Denis_P on 07-24-2017
RosieCheeks
Adultery is an unforgivable crime against loyalty and love in the family. To my mind, the person who cheated on his/her spouse is a traitor. There is no excuses and divorce is the only way.To forgive a traitor is like to give the reason for self-humiliation and disrespect.
Posted by RosieCheeks on 07-24-2017
Corzhens
Pardon me if I didn't vote because I am torn between the 2 issues. For me, divorce can be the closure to adultery or maybe let's call it infidelity of one spouse. I don't think I can live with it when my husband would have another lover. But in fairness to that hypothetical scenario, if I cannot make my husband sexually satisfied then probably I would forgive him. It really depends on the gravity and reason for the adultery before I can say that it can lead to divorce. And in our society, marriage is important so as long as the parties can settle the issue amicably then that would be the best instead of resorting to divorce.
Posted by Corzhens on 07-24-2017
peachpurple
I doubt any couples would be able to forgive and forget a spouse who is an adulterer. It is difficult to maintain a smooth and strong bonding in the marriage but if it is for the sake of the children, I am sure that the victim will endure the adultery and not request for a divorce. My nephew is an adulterer. He has a Thailand mistress while his wife is working very hard to earn money to supplement income for the family and the kids are still young. Yet, she didn't mind of his adultery . That , I REALLY could not understand her kindness. I would had show him the divorce paper and slap him on the face.
Posted by peachpurple on 07-24-2017
JaiGuru
It's certainly justification for divorce, and I'd argue it's flat-out asking for it. Regardless of your religious beliefs, there's a simple contractual obligation you are making to another person based in mutual trust. If you cannot fulfill that obligation then what is the marriage even based on? This is not to say I don't think there's a possibility of reconciliation. Some couples can weather such a mistake. But there is absolutely justification to simply call it a wash after cheating if that's how the offended party feels.
Posted by JaiGuru on 07-24-2017
JMS
Yes, it does justify divorce because it is a betrayal and a broken vow. Unless of course, the two parties in the marriage have both agreed to have other partners if they want to.

When we marry someone we are declaring to the world that we love that person above all others. We are saying that we have made our choice of bedfellow and we are off the market. If one partner wants to still have intimacies with others then they are not ready for marriage.
Posted by JMS on 07-24-2017
overcast
I think it definitely does justify. Be it any gender. Both should understand that it should be taken for a means to divorce. You can see that there are couples who may forgive each other. But that's something I am guessing almost every family have to deal with. Not something you can get out of any random ways. You just have to understand when to continue and when to bow out of such relationship.
Posted by overcast on 07-24-2017
Sue
It is hard to say what you would do unless you are put in that situation. I would say that I would leave because nobody deserves to be in a relationship where there is no respect. If somebody respected you or loved you they would never cheat on you or be out looking for another. Cheating is the worse betrayal and a good reason for divorce. If I person chooses to stay and work through it then I would not judge them. That is their decision. It would be hard though because you can forgive somebody but you can never forget about what the did and how badly it hurt.
Posted by Sue on 07-24-2017
amitkokiladitya
For me anything that holds a relationship is trust. If anything happens that questions this entity then for me it is an end of relationship. I cannot bear the load of any relationship which is build on betrayal and compulsion. I would prefer to be free rather than to be bound in any relationship that will trouble me from inside. All I want is peace of mind and nothing else.
Posted by amitkokiladitya on 07-24-2017
arachnophobik
I don't like divorces but I'm not against them. I just don't plan on letting my kids go through any of that ever, but as for adultery and divorce, I agree that it's justifiable. Adultery is being unfaithful to your wife/husband, and faith is the very definition of why you two were married in the first place. You two put your faiths in one another, a faith that you will lead a happy life together, with only the two of you helping each other side by side, going through the ups and downs. There is no need for another person to enter unless one simply lost his faith to the other.
Posted by arachnophobik on 07-24-2017
luispas
Yes, if I'll get marry one day (I wish it happens), if my partner does that I will completely separate from him because I cannot tolerate this kind of things, I know myself and I'll do as much as I could to be away from him, I will move from that house and maybe that city and I wouldn't want to have more contact, I'll be so pissed and disappointing that our relationship will end on that moment.
Posted by luispas on 07-24-2017
rose thornes
This is difficult. I never been married but I believe marriage is sacred and bond by God. Before marriage choose wisely whom you'll marry because it's a lifetime commitment.
Posted by rose thornes on 07-24-2017
BigDreamer
This is not something that I could ever forget and I think the relationship would be ruined after an affair. An affair goes beyond the normal ups and downs of a marriage. It is something that should not be done if you are in love with the person.
Posted by BigDreamer on 07-24-2017
Happyflowerlady
I think that it depends on the circumstances and how the two people involved look at things. No one is perfect, and it is entirely possible that a person who truly loved their spouse might slip up and have an affair, but be truly sorry afterwards. Maybe they were working away from home, and got drunk one night and ended up going home with a girl they met at a bar, or a guy they met if it was a woman that had the affair. I think that I would look at this differently than I would when the other person is habitually unfaithful, whether to one other lover, or just played around with many lovers. That person is obviously not sorry, and not going to change; so in this case, I think that getting a divorce is the best answer.
Posted by Happyflowerlady on 07-24-2017
reginafalange
I don't think I would accept such thing. You must respect your partner so if you decide you cheat on them, please, be mature enough and end the relationship before just making it worst. Is not healthy to stay in a relationship that it is already broken just to save the sacredness of marriage. The most honest and healthiest thing to do for yourself is to part ways. Cheating is the most disgusting act of disrespect that anybody can do to another person, and shouldn't be accepted by any circumstances.
Posted by reginafalange on 07-24-2017
Marvadaum
Yeah while I agree that cheating is something that happens I would totally get a divorce over this. If I found out my girlfriend was cheating I would break up with an "It's her loss" attitude. I mean you can't trust someone who cheats and if you can't trust someone there is no serious relationship.
Posted by Marvadaum on 07-24-2017
fireball916
I don't believe in a formal marriage or that having sexual relations with multiple people is bad so I don't think "cheating" is a reason for divorce.
Posted by fireball916 on 07-24-2017
joegirl
Yes. Adultery is such a huge thing to get over and trust lost is very difficult to regain. Especially if the offending partner is a serial cheat. I think the big question or debate should be "why do men cheat more than women?"
Posted by joegirl on 07-25-2017
missionreport
Adultery is a valid ground to file divorce. There is no such thing as a circumstance or situation that validates sexual activity outside of marriage. If for any reason you found your partner cheating on you, do yourself a favor and find someone who deserves you better. No matter how much he or she apologizes, that lying bitch will still try to keep both of you in his life.
Posted by missionreport on 07-25-2017
Sue
I couldn't agree more. There is no excuse for adultery. Everybody deserves a partner who will love and respect them and never step out side of their relationship to seek another. If the seek out another then they didn't really love you in the first place. Leavr and find somebody who will. There are lots of good honest people out there who would never cheat.
Posted by Sue on 07-25-2017
fushius
Adultery is probably the worst thing a human can to a relationship outside of physically hurting someone. It's like saying you just want to have fun but don't want to do it with a person you're married to because there's nothing new and exciting there. I find particularly annoying at how some women continuously attempt to justify their adultery and can't take the blame. No, he didn't drove you to cheat, you did that yourself. Sorry, sensitive subject.
Posted by fushius on 07-25-2017
Sue
It is not just women it is men too who try to justify why they cheated. There is never an excuse for cheating. If people are having problems in their relationships then they should talk to their partner other seek marriage counselling. Bringing another person into the relationship is not going to help things.
Posted by Sue on 07-25-2017
lovely
I don't why people just believe that adultery mainly concerns women, A man would cheat and it looks normal but a woman cheats and it like heaven would fall especially in Africa.In fact, there was a time it looked normal for an African man to cheat and even bring his mistress home and no eyelid would be lifted because he is a man and the woman dare not talk about divorce or else one would be seen as a bad wife.Adultery is a sin against God and God says divorce is the answer.
Posted by lovely on 01-19-2018
Mehano
I know that there are people who can easily forgive their cheating spouses but I am definitely not one of them. If I would get married to somebody, I would take my vows very seriously - cheating is a breach of it and therefore I would divorce the person. If my husband cheated on me, he would completely break my heart and crushed me. He would lose all of my trust and a relationship can never work without that. Sure, we could try and fix it but there would always be the ''what if'' at the back of my head. I could never forget what he has done so I think the divorce would be the only option.
Posted by Mehano on 07-25-2017
Zyni
I believe it does. As noted, even the Bible says that infidelity is grounds for divorce. Adultery often hurts more than just the cheated on spouse as well. It can damage entire families. It's selfish, irresponsible, and dishonest. Does anyone really want to stay married to someone like that? How would you ever be able to trust them again?

Forgiving them is one thing. Staying married to them is quite another.
Posted by Zyni on 07-25-2017
JoeMilford
Yes--adultery pretty much dissolves and disintegrates the bond of trust which marriage is supposed to represent. I can tell you from experience that you can forgive them, but you will never trust them again, and so living that way, with a person who has ultimately betrayed you, can eat away at you day by day, and it is not healthy. Let them go. Sure, people make mistakes, but these mistakes are choices, and if someone chooses to cheat on you, he or she does not really want to stay committed to you in the first place.
Posted by JoeMilford on 07-25-2017
sspi
Adultery removes trust and the love a couple had towards each other. However i would opt for seperation, not divorce.
Posted by sspi on 07-26-2017
VintageRose
Divorce doesn't need to be 'justified'. There doesn't have to BE a reason for divorcing someone; sometimes love just disappears and both parts wish to move on to a different relationship, sometimes both parts seek different things, etc. With this I want to say that divorce can be justified by ANYTHING because there are plenty reasons for it, and not a single one of them of invalid; it doesn't matter why two parts want to separate, the only part that matters is that they cannot stand to continue the relationship.

That said, adultery is one of the most common ones because trust is gone, and some people are not able to continue life together under those circumstances. Some are able to forgive and forget, though, so it depends on each case.
Posted by VintageRose on 07-26-2017
zheh
Ofcourse adultery is the common reason why married couple wants divorce and it's understandable, because once you've been cheated it's really hard to trust again. And it would really be painful if you got cheated. So it's hard to keep the relationship that's why they end up to divorce. But it all depends on the two people. There are others who can try to forgive. And it's also ok as long as they can still work their relationship out.
Posted by zheh on 08-22-2017
Istine
Committing adultery is a mortal sin. It is never acceptable in the eyes of God and in the eyes of men. What is the point of living together in roof when one is not honest enough about the other? Trust is the foundation of Marriage and without it there will be a lot of misunderstanding. It opens doors to a chaotic life between couples. Thus, once the foundation weakens the structure is of no use.

Yet, as human as we are, we all commit mistakes but we are also entitled for forgiveness. The whole concept of Marriage evolves with Love and as long as there’s love there will always be forgiveness no matter how grave the sin is. After all there will always be a room for second chances.
Posted by Istine on 08-25-2017
vinaya
I will never be in a relation if my spouse cheates me for another man. Likewise, I will remain faithful to my partner all my life. I cannot accept adultry. For a relationship to work, you need to loyal to your partners. If there is no loyalty, there is no point in staying together. I dislike people who cheat thero partners.
Posted by vinaya on 08-30-2017
Corzhens
I cannot imagine myself to live with a spouse who cheated me. My husband is very loving and I trust him for his fidelity. But if he will cheat on me by having another woman then I would probably end our relationship. It’s not good to have a final decision but I don’t think I can have the heart to forgive him for what he had done to me. I only love him because he loves me.
Posted by Corzhens on 10-18-2018
Heatman
Yes of course it justify divorce, if such doesn't warrant for a divorce in the world today, then I think there is nothing else that is worth getting divorced over. Adultery is the highest of ills one should commit in marriages and it is not something to be easily forgiven since it's something that the culprit did with two open eyes.

Sometimes I wonder why people do so, is it that their current marriage is not enough for them? But mostly I seem to have any reasonable answer to my question and therefore I stick on my ground that it's more than enough to divorce on grounds of Adultery.
Posted by Heatman on 09-10-2017
Marvadaum
Pretty much. It's not about forgiveness it's about repeated offense. If it's happened once then it can certainly happen again. I would forgive the person, yes but I would get a divorce all the same. Once your trust is broken you can't fix it ever.
Posted by Marvadaum on 09-10-2017
Wubwub
I think it's one of the best reasons for filing for divorce. Not even considering the bible, it's just practical. If both of you entered into a contract saying you both will be monogamous and if one of you negates that then the contract is void. I don't think there would be many other actions above that to warrant divorce and by that I mean if not this reason then what else? There are situations when this can be fixed but I think in general people don't really have the type of mindset to get over such a thing.
Posted by Wubwub on 10-10-2017
lovely
I believe it does even the bible says we should divorce our partners on the grounds of adultery,if one cherishes his or her family then they shouldn't even think about it let alone cheat.This is the only sin against our body, we defiled our body and that of our partner when we cheat,so to me if children have not involved it a very big reason to part ways but with kids in the mix, forgiven should be considered and the culprit should promise not to do that again.
Posted by lovely on 12-12-2017
cmoneyspinner
Yes. Adultery is grounds for divorce. The unfaithful partner defiled the marriage bed. Not to mention they also could have possibly brought home a disease and endangered the partner's health or life. Adultery is a grave sin. But adultery can also be forgiven. My friend forgave her husband and did not ask for a divorce. She could have. But she didn't.
Posted by cmoneyspinner on 12-29-2017
hermessantos
Certainly!If the person committed adultery, then it means that she simply does not want to live with her partner anymore. Therefore, divorce is the most recommended in this case. I'm not the best person to talk about, but I try to be as logical as possible.
Posted by hermessantos on 01-20-2018
Frank
I know the Bible is against adultery and the Bible has supported divorce on this grounds but if the defaulted partner should apologize and repent I think there should be acceptance by the other partner especially if kids are involved.
Posted by Frank on 12-10-2018
Kakashi2020
I don't think that cheating justifies getting divorce unless both parties agrees to it. But if only one party is willing then sighting adultery or cheating in my opinion shouldn't merit a divorce.
Posted by Kakashi2020 on 12-11-2018
ajahcuizon
When we already experienced to be cheated on, it is normal to lose our trust and confidence on one person. Making ourselves think that we should not forgive them anymore and get divorce. But there are peoplw who choose to stay with their partners eventhough they already cheated because of of some reasons like their family and children. It is just a matter choice.
Posted by ajahcuizon on 12-11-2018
chatbox
Adultery is a valid cause for divorce. It is a betrayal of both marriage vows and trust which can hurt and haunt a couple's relationship. Staying in a marriage with an adulterous spouse also creates an unstable atmosphere for the family and the betrayed spouse which can be worse than separation. However, I've known people who have chosen to give their spouse a chance and it has worked well for them and their family. Some marriages and spouses are indeed worth fighting for. In some cases, adultery could just be the culmination of all things that have been going wrong in the marriage. In any case, divorce is something that should be decided on only after a thorough contemplation and not as a quick response to pain.
Posted by chatbox on 12-16-2018